I did not plan on writing a post this
morning. Like most moms, I have a
huge list of things to tackle as this week gets off to a start. But President Obama's comments this
weekend about stay-at-home moms was so blatantly wrong, I had to brush off the
PhD and correct the man. My problem come not with the economy of it all, but rather with his continual push for daycare over mother-care, and his complete disregard for the data.
“Sometimes, someone, usually
Mom, leaves the workplace to stay home with the kids, which then leaves her
earning a lower wage
for the rest of her life as a result.
“That’s not a choice we want
Americans to make.”-Obama
Apparently Obama’s
brand is feminism has moved from encouraging women to make choices,
to making evaluative assessments of those choices.
to making evaluative assessments of those choices.
That is not progress.
Getting beyond the offense of the statement, I need to point out why is he wrong -
based on FACTS and DATA - not just emotion. Why do we actually WANT
American women to choose to be a full-time mom, rather than putting her children in
day-care? I break it down into
three areas:
Benefits to
the Child, the Mother, and the Family
Benefits to the Child
The deficit model of research is a great way to
explain 'benefits' of childcare.
If children are growing up in abject poverty, and they would not receive quality care at home, then having
those children spend time in high quality childcare will result in more
beneficial outcomes. If however,
the quality of childcare is not greater than that which the children would receive at
home, then any benefits are diminished.
Similarly, if you have a child who would normally spend the day engaged
in high quality child care at home (with
a loving parent or family member), and you put that same child in any childcare center, you won't see the same
overall benefits.
Therefore, the situations where daycare is
overall more beneficial to the child, are those situations when the quality of
care they would receive at home is poor,
and the day care center they attend is high
quality. Children who were in high
quality 'center' type daycare centers, had better reading, math, and memory
skills at third grade than did other children. But children who spent the most
time in these high quality day cares were, more demanding, less
willing to obey, and had more trouble getting along with peers. Furthermore, greater time in childcare
was associated with poor working habits, and poor internalizing behavior
(Data presented at the Society for Research in Child Development, 2005).
America stronger" -Obama
Look at the data first Mr. President. Let's be realistic- not every center can be high quality. I have worked in them and I have studied them - it is just not possible. But even if they were all high quality, the data doesn't support your premise that daycare is better overall than a mother's care.
Benefits to the Mother
The number of full-time mothers is actually
rising. In 2014, 29% of all
mothers are full-time mothers and about two-thirds of those are
"traditional" families with working husbands. Only 6% of full-time moms say they WANT
to be employed and are unable to find a job (Pew Research
Center).
So it seems like a large number of families have
made just the choice that President Obama finds so damning. Why? Why would anyone want to be a full-time mom? Again, let’s look at the data - Working
moms spend less time on housework than full time mothers, but they also spend
less time with their children actively engaged in child care tasks (11 vs. 18),
less time engaged in leisure activities (22 vs. 31), and get less sleep (58 vs.
63) each week (Pew Research Center).. So full-time moms spend almost twice
the amount of active engagement with their kids, a third more leisure time, and
more sleep in exchange for doing more household work and a paycheck (some of
which goes back to pay for childcare).
Let’s look at their active engagement number -
The active engagement number doesn't take the normal day to day interactions into account.
The active engagement number doesn't take the normal day to day interactions into account.
On average,
the typical baby will spend
about 50
hours a week less with a working mom
than with a
full-time mom.
This assumes a mother only works a 40-hour week,
does not travel, and both the working and full-time mother spend the same time
with their baby on the weekend. In
two parent households, this 4 hours-a-day is also shared time with the spouse
rather than exclusive time with the child as it is for most full-time
mothers. So although there
is only 9 hours different in active childcare activities each week, there are
actually 50 hours a week difference in available interactions and very little
1:1 time without spouse involved as well.
Benefits to the Family
Americans disagree with the president. As of April 2014, "60% of
Americans say children are better off when a parents stays home to focus
on the family, while 35% say they are just as well off when both parents
work outside the home" (Pew Research
Center)..
Note - the survey authors did not ask if children are better
off having both parents work outside the home, they said just as well off.
Full-time moms spend on average, an extra 9 hours
on housework each week. This lets
them spend their weekends engaged with their spouse and kids- spending quality
time as a family, and reduces overall household stress.
A
stay-at-home mom is not just a
paycheck -
sitting - at -home
Life is about more than economics. Full-time moms are there to pick their
sick kids up from school, to help in the classroom, to volunteer at
non-profits, to start ministries…they take their children on walks, feed the
ducks at the park with the little ones, and to run all those errands too. They tuck the toddlers in for naps and
share lunch with them everyday.
You can't measure their interactions with their children, and you can't
assign any economic value to what they do.
So I say to President Obama - Keep your attention
focused on the business of this country and stop judging the choices
these families make.
Let women do what is right for them, and their
children, and stop
devaluing the job they do, lest you start a New War on Women.
