When should my child start school?

In The Land of Triple Degree Summers, one if the biggest issue for expectant parents is how to keep the mamma-to-be as cool as possible.  Being pregnant in 115 degree temperatures is not pleasant. For those whose children have summer births, concerns over temperatures morph into concerns about when to start school. Most schools accept children who are age 5-6 for kindergarden, some will accept children at age 4 as long as they have a late summer or early fall birthday.  This presents the school with a situation where a kindergarden class can have children who range in age from older 4s to younger or middle 6s.

To start or not to start... That is the question...
Private schools (and maybe public too although I don't know about them) seem to be going through a trend of suggesting that kids delay starting school. Sometimes it has less to do with individual readiness, but more to do with the schools test-scores and performance.  Schools want older kids. They want children who will perform well. They want kids who will sit in their seats better, follow directions better, listen more attentively - basically kids who are older.

The problem comes in when these older children are seated next to younger ones. You can have kids who differ in age by as much as two years seated side by side.  And there is a huge difference between a 4 year old and a 6 year old!

Like with most big parenting decisions, the choice to start or not to start is one that should be made after considerable thought. There is actual research on this subject too. The opinions and experiences of others is invaluable, but other peoples opinions are person specific and biased, so I figured I would share some of the actual research here. 

First off, boys and girl are different (shock, gasp, I said it) 
and so my advice is tailored to gender.   

Boys who are on the cusp (late summer/fall birthday) and just turned 5, will generally do better if they wait a year to start. Boys tend to be less socially mature, have a harder time sitting still, have a harder time with the fine motor skills.

Ways to Give as a Family

Practicing the Corporal Works of Mercy is important for us all. Setting an example of service and showing your kids that service is rewarding spiritually, is a lifelong gift and an important life lesson. Below is a list of ways you can serve as a family as well as a list of organizations that are ready to accept help.

Serve those in need within your 

community and beyond

Give Alms to the Poor

Collect alms from the neighbors you know and send money to an international agency like
Catholic Relief Services (click here) - Rice for Life - Create a rice bowl for those in need.

Burying the Dead 

Attend a funeral mass.   You don't have to know the deceased in order to attend and pray for the repose of his/her soul.  Pray for the departed. 

Visit the Sick

Make cards for people in a local Alzheimer home or for children in the local children's hospital. 

Feed the Hungry & Give Water to the Thirsty

Feed My Starving Children (ages 5+)
This Christian non-profit offers the opportunities for families and groups to work in 2 hour food packing sessions. Children and adults work to pack food boxes which are then shipped to distribution centers and ultimately to families in need throughout the world.  Click here to register.

Paz de Cristo (ages 12+)
A faith-based non-profit which provides food, clothing and other assistance to those in need.  Their evening meal service and food boxes provide over 50, 000 meals monthly to people in or near poverty.  Volunteers are welcome to come assist in the evening food preparation and service to those visiting for meals. See website (click here) for additional information and to register to volunteer. 

Tempe Community Action Agency (click here for listing)
Interfaith Homeless Emergency Lodging Program (I-HELP) (all ages)
-IHELP provides meals and lodging on an emergency basis at various churches in the valley.  Families can help prepare and serve meals on location, or help with providing snack bags for the participants.  Additional help with bedding and laundering towels is also needed.  For more information, contact Marcus Ziegler, I-HELP Program Manager at 480-350-5892.
Home Meal Delivery (all ages)
-Families pick up food at the senior center in the morning and deliver the meals to a number of locations.  Some additional training and certifications are generally required and a commitment of 6 + hours a month is requested.

Community Gardens (all ages)
Do you have a family with green thumbs? Do you have kids who love to dig and need to be outside? Contact Leilia Woodard (480-882-8324 ) to see how you can help with the community Garden at Paz. Opportunities are seasonal.

St. Vincent de Paul (click here for a variety of opportunities) 
Feeding the Hungry (ages 8+) 
- Nightly opportunities to feed the hungry at their main campus 420 W Watkins St.
Hearts and Hands (all ages)
- Children do a variety of things including making centerpieces or cards, filling shampoo or soap bottles, and decoration the facility for the guest who come to receive services.
Dream Center Kids 
- volunteers act as tutors or lead children's activities during the dinner hours.

Maggie's Place (all ages)
Maggie's Place is a Catholic non-profit that provides food, shelter, and training to pregnant and parenting mothers in need.  They currently have six houses in the Phoenix and Cleveland areas and are exploring expansion opportunities in Dallas as well.  Each house has monthly "Serve Saturday" when volunteers come to the home ready to work in a variety of capacities.  In additional to the Saturday help, volunteers are needed to make meals, babysit during group meetings, teach moms a new skill set, clean house, wash cars - really do what ever needs to be done at the time.  Please contact the home nearest you to find out what is needed and to schedule a time for your family to come serve (link provided here).

Salvation Army's (shelter dependent)
This faith based organization provides a variety of services including hunger and housing relief as well as other  programs such as their prison ministry and veteran outreach.   With opportunities to serve worldwide see their website (click here)  to find the closest shelter and best opportunity to serve.

UMOM (all ages)
This faith-based organization provides a number of resources to individuals and families in need.  Operating the largest shelter in phoenix, their resources are vast as are their needs for volunteers.  Volunteers must attend at training session and be pre-approved before serving within the program.  Their Read to Me program welcome volunteers of all ages. For more information on their needs, as well as the age requirements for the different areas to serve, see their web-site (click here). 

Families Giving Back
Maintains an online calendar of volunteer opportunities for children.  See their up to date volunteer opportunities(click here), including both regular opportunities as well as individual one-time events.

Thanks for stopping by!

How to Make a Catholic Education Affordable

Living in the land of charter schools, our family was faced with many appealing and diverse options for a free education for our children.  Like providing food on the table and shelter for their bodies, Catholic schooling is not cheap.  Tuition, uniforms, school fees - it all adds up and it can be tough for many families. Contrary to the Myth Catholic schools did not surface to take care of the educational needs of the wealthy.  Socio-economic diversity abounds in many Catholic schools because assistance also abounds. Making Catholic education affordable is something that every diocese strives to do and there are plenty of state and local groups who are wiling to help make a Catholic education possible for every child.

State Level

Within Arizona, there exists a Catholic education organization which is a 501c3.  Formerly known as CTDOP it is now just called Catholic Education Arizona.  Couples and individuals can contribute to this organization as part of their tax credit.  The money will not go to a specific student, but rather to the school's tuition fund. Families looking for tuition assistance apply for need based awards through this organization each year.   For more information click here.  Applications open in February and you must submit a FAIR application.

Parish Level

Our parish offers a Parish Scholarship for families registered and active in either our parish or another local parish.  This covers roughly 20 - 30% (or more) of the price of tuition. Our parish also introduced the Stewardship Program some years ago. This program encourages families to increase their commitment to prayer life, service, and tithing. Families enter into a contract with the parish and receive all parish resources (including school tuition) as part of the commitment.  Stewardship families are given full tuition coverage as part of their Parish Scholarship.

Many Catholic schools also offer a tuition reduction for families with multiple kids enrolled.  Our Parish Scholarship offers more assistance for each child enrolled, thus providing a multi-child discount for active Catholic families.

School Level

Beyond the programs in writing, I know most parishes would work very hard to be able to provide a Catholic education for families that desire it. We have a Development Director at our school and she works with each family to find assistance to fit their needs.  Below is a list of national and local School Tuition Organizations (STO's) she provided me to supplement this post!  According to Kelly, STO's "offer parents the opportunity to apply for need based financial aid as well as offering a means for families to establish individual student accounts in which donors recommend that their tax credit go to a particular student". There are over 60 such organization just in Arizona.  Below is a sampling of those organization that are helping students at our school.

Private and Other Help 

AAA Scholarship foundation (click here).  Applications available beginning March 16th.
Arizona 4 Education Scholarship Foundation (click here).
Arizona Private Education Scholarship Fund (click here). Applications accepted starting April 11th.
Arizona Scholarship Fund (click here).
Arizona School Choice Trust (click here). 
Brophy Community Foundation (click here).
Institute for Better Education (click here). Applications accepted until March 18th.
Tuition Organization for Private Schools (click here). Applications available after May1st.
Arizona Leadership Foundation (click here). Applications available late March, early April and due by June 15th.
Arizona Empowerment Scholarship (click here). Application period is January 1- April 1st.

All application dates are for the year 2016

Having school choice has broadened the possibilities for many families.  Some choose to enroll their children at the neighborhood public school, others choose non-traditional public schools, and still others find that homeschooling is the best fit for their families or certain children within the family.  My background in child development and Education has taught me that there is no single 'best' fit for all kids - rather parents should look at the options and children and seek to find the best solution for each family member. I encourage Catholic parents to look at Parochial schools as an option.  It is one that can be affordable and it may just be an answer to your prayers.

Good Luck, God Bless, and thanks for stopping by!

Thanks to Kathryn at TeamWhitaker for linking up with me this Catholic Schools Week.  To read her 7 Reasons Why Catholic School Matters click here!

To read my favorite 5 reasons for sending my kids to a Catholic school click here...

Entering into Lent

My Advent was a total fail.

Seriously.

I think we lit the candles on the Advent Wreath most nights simply because my children have pyromaniatic tendencies, but other than that it was a mess.

I had my surgery (explained here) three days into Advent so I know I have an excuse.  I don't feel particularly guilty about how Advent went, but I am energized now to really embrace Lent. I don't think I have ever been excited about fasting, prayer, and almsgiving.  The post surgery recovery has been filled with 'rest time', eating, drinking sugary coffee drinks, eating more, and binge watching Netflix. I am ready to snap my physical and spiritual world back into shape, but I really don't want to go too crazy with my aspirations and lead with another seasonal fail.

My plan is pretty simple.

Prayer.  

In the morning before I brush my teeth. Even if it is a short and sweet prayer - just something.  I love my Blessed is She devotionals.  They come to my email like magic in the middle of the night so they are often the first thing I look at when I turn on my phone in the morning. They give me the days reading and a short reflection with some question or two to ponder through the day. I am really going to work to make this a serious habit and not just a usual thing. I am also going to the Beauty for Ashes Retreat (signup here!).  It will be wonderful!

Almsgiving.  

I need to do some more serious purging of my home.  Not just getting rid of clutter, but really determining what I do/do not need, and getting rid of nice things that I do not need.  I have a tendency to hold on to things because I like them and only getting rid of stuff that I don't like.  I am going to try to focus on giving away some good stuff that is just excess.

Fasting.  

In the past I have looked for loop holes - pregnant & nursing or illness - anything that would let me get out of fasting guilt free.  Is that horrible to admit? I really don't like fasting but oh my body needs it.  It is crazy to think that the church in all her wisdom knew of the importance for our bodies to spend some time being cleansed of the excesses of life!  So I am actually (gasp) looking forward to fasting on Fridays (and the obligatory Ash Wednesday & Good Friday too).  I am going to try to focus on more simple meals too this 40 days. A dear friend told me wisely that even Cambells Soup for dinner can be an expression of Love - it is better to do it simple & lovingly than extravagantly with tears.

Family Life.

As a family we need to find something charitable to do as well so I am looking into those local options.  We keep a kindness and sacrifice jar on the table during Lent as well and each child makes some personal commitments as to how they want to live their time during Lent.  "Not Yelling" is typically something that makes everyones list.  We trace our hands and then write our commitments on those hands.  They all go up on a paper cross I put up in our hallway.  We then have a visual reminder all 40 days that we are each striving to live out certain commitments. Keeping the focus for the whole 40 days is hard for adults and kids too.  I have some other ideas on what to do in my post from last year (read here).

This year in addition to the handprints and jar,we are going to have a little pre-Lent family talk about virtue and sin.  I was listening to a conversation this week on Catholic Radio's Fighting the Good Fight with Barbara McGuigan.  Her guest (whose name eludes me & I couldn't trace) was discussing the relationship between sin and virtue and brining forth the ideas of St Thomas Aquinas among others.  I loved the way he presented the virtues as a way of battling sin.  He discussed our tendency towards certain evils (maybe pride or anger) and the complement virtue that we can strive for to combat the specific sin.  St. Thomas Aquinas points out that our sins are often hidden from us and therefore made difficult for us to eradicate.  Striving for a virtuous life, rather than focusing on rooting out sin, can therefore act a as a backdoor to combat those specific tendencies we want to reduce or eliminate.